It was a year ago last Sunday that my ex girlfriend, Emma, died. She was only 29 years old. And a few weeks shy of her 30th birthday.
I was sitting in work on the Monday morning, running through my emails when my friend Jamie called with the news. On this enlightenment, I thought it wise to leave work then. Although I had only seen Emma briefly in the last few years, I still thought of her often, wondering how she was getting on and only two days before this, I was talking about her with one of my good friends as we enjoyed a few beers, blissfully unaware she would be taking her last breath and exiting planet dust in a matter of hours. It came as a massive shock to be honest, like a deep void had suddenly been created in my life and I really didn’t expect that. I suppose you are not in control of these things. So as I went into partial meltdown for the week, my fiancée patiently waited for me to resurface on the other side.
This is a sad story from start to finish. A hard battle that she often faced alone. Sadly, Emma had been struggling badly with depression and had recently been diagnosed as bi-polar, which would explain a few things. With some questionable life choices in the mixer, the outcome didn't look overly optimistic. There is a lot that I could write with regards to this but I won't. I shall save us all from my badly conscripted tale of these events, for her sake at least. I just didn't want the occasion to pass without being noted.
They say you learn something new from everyone you meet. I believe this is also true of people you simply pass in the street, acknowledging each others existence with only a smile. But from Emma, I'm not sure what I learned. A total melting pot but much more than I first realised. First love and heartbreak. Life and friendship would also be true. Maybe it's that you have to enjoy what you have at the time, as your time is short. You are here and then you are gone. And where after that, we do not know. We should just be good to each other. She will be sadly missed but hopefully now, she is in a better place.
I was sitting in work on the Monday morning, running through my emails when my friend Jamie called with the news. On this enlightenment, I thought it wise to leave work then. Although I had only seen Emma briefly in the last few years, I still thought of her often, wondering how she was getting on and only two days before this, I was talking about her with one of my good friends as we enjoyed a few beers, blissfully unaware she would be taking her last breath and exiting planet dust in a matter of hours. It came as a massive shock to be honest, like a deep void had suddenly been created in my life and I really didn’t expect that. I suppose you are not in control of these things. So as I went into partial meltdown for the week, my fiancée patiently waited for me to resurface on the other side.
This is a sad story from start to finish. A hard battle that she often faced alone. Sadly, Emma had been struggling badly with depression and had recently been diagnosed as bi-polar, which would explain a few things. With some questionable life choices in the mixer, the outcome didn't look overly optimistic. There is a lot that I could write with regards to this but I won't. I shall save us all from my badly conscripted tale of these events, for her sake at least. I just didn't want the occasion to pass without being noted.
They say you learn something new from everyone you meet. I believe this is also true of people you simply pass in the street, acknowledging each others existence with only a smile. But from Emma, I'm not sure what I learned. A total melting pot but much more than I first realised. First love and heartbreak. Life and friendship would also be true. Maybe it's that you have to enjoy what you have at the time, as your time is short. You are here and then you are gone. And where after that, we do not know. We should just be good to each other. She will be sadly missed but hopefully now, she is in a better place.
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